Pirates are to Ninjas as Robots are to Bears

A photo of a man in a pirate costume holding a knife.

The Funk Mistress has this to hujpak:

I am sick of trying to figure out synonyms for “say” every time I update, especially since I don’t think anyone noticed I was doing it anyway.

Therefore, I will begin making up new words as I see fit, hence the word “hujpak”.

I am allowed to do this, because I am an English Major. Eat me.

I have decided that I will also learn Latin in the near future.

Eventually, you can look forward to posts written, at least partially, in Latin. I think this will help RIA appeal to a long overlooked fan base: dead philosophers and dead early modern period British writers.

I also look forward to getting scurvy, to reach out to our pirate fans. The Funk Mistress needs all the pirate help she can get, seeing as pirates are the natural born enemy of the ninjas (and The Funk Mistress has a long standing rivalry with some no-good ninjas who messed up her car and are constantly trying to take over her kingdom).

Pirates are to Ninjas as Robots are to Bears; important to remember when taking the SAT exam.

To anyone in The Woodsman’s writing class: I am not The Funk Mistress because I smell funky; on the contrary, I smell quite nice. Like fresh laundry and lavender. Rather, I am The Funk Mistress because I rock.

And besides, what else would you call someone who rules over The Funk Lands?

Fools, this is the stuff they should be teaching you in college.



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